Alisa Valdes on Writing, Rejection, and Blessings
Cover of The Dirty Girls Social Club: A Novel
Best-selling novelist Alisa Valdes spoke at the Southwest Writers meeting on December 3, 2011. She is a warm, down-to-earth, engaging speaker and kept me, and everyone else in the room, laughing virtually non-stop: when she talked about how entertainment industry executives tend to (mis)categorize Latinas, she said, “I don’t wake up in the morning and think, ‘I’m a poor, oppressed Latina.’ I wake up and think, ‘I gotta pee and I need coffee.’ Just like everybody else.” She had lots to say on a variety of topics, from the business of writing to learning to let go.
On Writing: “It’s a passion, and it’s a job.” Common advice that I have been hearing from writers is that you need to market yourself and not rely on the agent or publisher to do that for you. Alisa affirmed this reality. The writing and publishing industry has become very corporate, she said, so writers have to look at the business side as well as the creative side. Just like putting on a suit to go to the office, writers must market themselves, which often times involves “remaking yourself to make it every single time.”
On Rejection: “You’re only as good as your last book.” Valdes’ debut novel The Dirty Girls Social Club, sold 700 thousand copies. Subsequent book sales, though far from shabby, came below that count, causing agents and publishers to look at her “like the prom queen who is now the lunch lady.” Ironic as it sounds, comfort and reassurance is to be found in the fact that even for successful writers, the rejection never stops. When Alisa queried her upcoming publication, a memoir titled Learning to Submit, she met with numerous rejection letters, some of which were so scathing Alisa’s agent wouldn’t let her read them.
On the Appeal of Twilight: “It’s not that the hero is a vampire, it’s that he’s a vegan vampire.” I, too, have tried to analyze why the Twilight books are like crack. (After my beloved pit bull died, the only book I could read without going into PTSD mode was Breaking Dawn. I know, given the grisly child-birth section, I don’t get it either.) To me, the series is an addictive blend of that intense adolescent yearning and that “I’ve been searching one hundred years for you” romance. Alisa herself said that today’s teenagers, especially girls, are constantly bombarded by images of sex devoid of affection, so they need stories of romance and love to fill that void. The Twilight saga fills that void. She also said that the grander overarching theme of choice and sacrifice is what elevates Twilight’s success to phenomenal: everything in the hero’s nature tells him to hunt, to kill, to suck blood, and he chooses not to. He sacrifices his needs and desires for love, for the greater good. In a time of economic crisis and Corporate greed, this is a powerful message.
On that Business with Ann Lopez: “Never get into a deal with someone just because they look like you. Decisions based on narcissism never lead anywhere good.” Alisa sold Ann Lopez the rights to her popular novel, The Dirty Girls Social Club. She trusted Ann to do right by her and her book. Instead, without Alisa’s knowledge and after Alisa had already relocated to L.A., Ann turned around and hired someone else to write the television script. Alisa, broke and disillusioned, hit the road back to Albuquerque, and just before she left, a friend slipped her a copy of the script. Alisa stopped at a roadside fast food joint to read it, and cried. Her beloved characters had been degraded into grotesque, dysfunctional caricatures, conveying a message completely contrary to the diverse, spirited, complex world Alisa had created. She protested this publicly on her blog. Ann Lopez then hired an experienced entertainment lawyer to go after Alisa for defamation. After many sleepless and tear-filled nights, followed by plenty of prayer, Alisa hired her own experienced entertainment lawyer who agreed to work pro bono because he couldn’t stand Lopez’s lawyer. The TV project died, and to Alisa’s surprise, Lopez let her rights to Dirty Girls expire, so Alisa once again owns her book. In a serendipitous twist of events, the entertainment lawyer Alisa hired is also an independent film producer, and he has introduced Alisa to a talented screenwriter who is now onboard to adapt Dirty Girls to the big screen. The lesson Alisa learned and the advice she offers as a result of this experience (besides always get good representation) is that “Every bad thing that happens to you is a blessing. You just don’t know it yet.”
On Learning to Submit: Alisa’s memoir, Learning to Submit, scheduled to be released in 2013, is about how she had to learn not to control everything, including falling in love. When you learn to let go, you receive the ideas, meet the people, and witness the events you need to reach your place in the world. Alisa’s creative and romantic life synchronized after she read a newspaper article about two young and gifted rodeo boys killed by carbon monoxide poisoning. She got the inspiration to start writing her Young Adult Kindred series, an endeavor that she says is the most true creation of her heart. About this time, following a string of bad to horrifying Match.com dates, she finally agreed to meet with a man she had previously rejected because she thought he could not possibly be right for her: a conservative, rural rancher. In a classic case of opposites attract, her cowboy has turned out to be a great boyfriend as well as a great supporter and teacher. He is the one who told her that her series hero could not be a bull rider, because bull riders are crazy, that he was a roper instead. The eerie coincidence? The man who pursued her despite her resistance and is now the love of her life is also friends with the family of one of the rodeo boys who died.
Kismet. The kind that happens when one learns to let go.
Check out Alisa Valdes’ blog Learning to Submit. Key posts:
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“Everyday Sunshine” – Fishbone Documentary
Image by Malkav via Flickr
I was never into punk rock. To me, it was all about boys chopping off their pretty early-eighties locks for punk haircuts (and from there it was a downward slide to skinhead-dom) while they talked bad about The Go-Go’s and Prince, which meant they were talking bad about girls and blacks. So I did not know a thing about Fishbone until I read that Everyday Sunshine: The Story of Fishbone was playing at the Guild Cinema. After seeing the documentary, I wish I’d known about them back then. I’d have loved them. At least, I think I would have. Hindsight is golden; after all, I used to shut the door to my room when Mom played her Led Zeppelin records, and didn’t find myself rocking out to “Whole Lotta Love” until I was in my mid-twenties. But I digress.
Fishbone’s dense, layered, vibrant music is a blend of punk plus what I felt was missing from punk music: rhythm, melody, rise and fall. As narrator Laurence Fishburne said, “They brought the funk to the punk.” When I watched their live performances, a stunning juxtaposition of chaotic energy and tight orchestration, I was surprised they didn’t achieve bigger stardom. One fan who was interviewed for the film said that Fishbone’s music was too complex for the masses to latch onto; another fan said they were too stylistically diverse to be contained in a marketable niche. The segregated music industry that had no idea what to do with an African American punk band was a factor as well.
At the Q&A session that followed the film, the audience got to ask film director Chris Metzler about his experiences working on this film. One viewer commented that it seemed like bassist Norwood was the grounded sensible one to lead singer Angelo’s crazier self. Chris Metzler said that after getting to know them, he concluded that both of them were kind of crazy. They were just crazy in different ways, so they balanced each other out. (One telling quote in the film was by Angelo himself: “Norwood and I are kind of like a married couple that want to be divorced for a minute, but they can’t because they’re f***ing married. We got kids. That’s the music.”) In listening to and watching my fellow film viewers who knew of Fishbone from the beginning and followed their career, it struck me how intensely they adored the band and cared about the band members’ happiness and relationships with each other.
Oh, what it would have meant to me to know of Fishbone during their heyday in the mid-eighties, when I was starting to realize there were repercussions to being both black and white, that I neither fit into the white world nor the black world, but a blend of both. Come to think of it, this is how Gwen Stefani describes Fishbone.
But the time is now. Time to go find Fishbone on iTunes.
Related articles
- Chris Metzler on his Fishbone Doc, Everyday Sunshine (blogs.sfweekly.com)
- ‘Everyday Sunshine’: Near-rise, fall of Fishbone (seattletimes.nwsource.com)
- Black Rock Biopic Hits Theaters (theroot.com)
- Movie Review | ‘Everyday Sunshine’: ‘Everyday Sunshine: The Story of Fishbone’ – Review (movies.nytimes.com)
Five Fave Fall Premieres
Fall is coming. The days are getting shorter and I’m about to start watching way too much television. Following are the five premieres I am most excited about.
Ringer—CW, Series Premiere Tuesday, September 13, 9/8c
Bridget: “Your life seems perfect.”
Siobhan: “No one’s life is perfect.”
Sarah Michelle Gellar returns to television in a marked departure from the Buffy the Vampire Slayer role she made so famous 14 years ago. Here she plays a recovering drug addict, Bridget, who has witnessed a brutal murder and is being offered federal protection for her testimony. When her well-off twin sister Siobhan commits suicide, Bridget, in a moment of fear and desperation, takes on her sister’s identity. Bridget becomes embroiled in her twin’s life, which turns out to be even more twisted and dangerous than the one Bridget is trying to escape.
Why I’m Hooked: The intriguing Hitchcock-esque plot is wish-fulfillment gone awry in the worse possible way and explores the dichotomy between the façade we show the world vs. what’s going on in our own personal hell.
Bridget: “Tonight seemed so happy.”
Andrew: “That was an act.”
Parenthood—NBC, Season Premiere Tuesday, September 13, 10/9c
Adam: “I’m just so happy we’re having a baby. I thought we were done. I love you.”
Kristina: “You had a third beer, didn’t you?”
Yay! The Braverman family is back for a third season of raising kids, navigating heartbreak, following passions, coping with tragedy, and still finding the joy and the laughter in life’s big and little moments.
Why I’m Hooked: I actually want a bit of real life about real people in my escape from my real life. The dilemmas are on-point and relatable, the sibling rivalry/camaraderie is funny as hell, and Adam and Kristina’s teamwork, affectionate kidding, and loving acceptance is a refreshing portrayal of a happily married couple. This beautiful partnership is summed up perfectly when their teenage daughter asks Adam in frustration if he and Kristina have some sort of pact where they ignore each other’s flaws.
Adam replies, “Yes, it’s called marriage.”
Nikita—CW, Season Premiere Friday, September 23, 8/7c
Michael: “Someone has to undo what’s been done.”
Nikita: “What we’ve done.”
Reformed political assassin Nikita has joined forces and is on the run with her lover and former adversary, Michael. Her student and partner on the inside, Alex, has turned against her and is now her greatest enemy. The secret killing organization Division is now being headed by the very scary interrogator Amanda. Season 2 is about to get interesting.
Why I’m Hooked: Tight, thrilling plots about redemption and moral duality executed by forces to be reckoned with. Then there is Nikita herself, whose combination of empathy and single-minded drive to right her past wrongs are in stark contrast to the tough, ruthless killer that made her so valuable to Division to begin with.
Amanda: “It’s too late to save yourself. But there may be time to save others.”
Nikita: “Right now, I’d be wondering about who’s going to save you.”
The Good Wife—CBS, Season Premiere Sunday, September 25, 9/8c
Will: “It’s always the good girls with the deep dark secrets.”
Alicia: “Because we’re catching up.”
Season 3 of this legal and political drama begins the morning after lawyer Alicia Florrick has finally consummated a long-simmering attraction with her years-smitten boss, Will Gardner. She is planning to divorce her husband, State’s Attorney Peter Florrick, since finding out he had a one night stand with her best friend, the law firm’s enigmatic and bad-ass investigator, Kalinda Sharma. Complicating matters is that Peter’s campaign manager, Eli Gold, has set up shop at Alicia’s law firm, making it even more difficult for Alicia to extricate herself from her husband’s personal and political sphere.
Why I’m Hooked: The wife standing silently by her famously sex-scandal cheating husband has her own story to tell, and her own life to rebuild. That story is smart, funny, dramatic, and played out by a cast of complex characters with even more complicated interrelationships that are delightful to watch.
Kalinda: “You ought to try it sometime.”
Alicia: “Flipping someone off?”
Kalinda: “It’s good for the soul.”
Once Upon a Time—ABC, Series Premiere Sunday, October 23, 8/7c
Emma: “Why doesn’t everybody just leave?”
Henry: “They can’t. If they try, bad things happen.”
Writers from Lost craft this new series where fairy tales and curses are real and the survival of our world hinges upon restoring the mythic realm we talk about but don’t really believe exists. Emma Swan’s life is about to change when the son she gave up ten years ago finds her and asks for her help. He insists that she is the daughter of Snow White and Prince Charming, and that only she can undo the Evil Queen’s curse that has frozen Emma’s parents in time and banished the possibility of a happy ending for all of eternity.
Why I’m Hooked: An unconventional hero, a bail bonds collector who has spent her life taking care of herself, must answer the call of a frightened little boy. She is the one who must save the traditional fairy tale land because hope in and of itself is what fuels the human spirit.
Snow White/Mary Margaret: “Believing in even the possibility of a happy ending is a very powerful thing.”
Related articles
- Fall TV Lineup: 10 Shows Worth Watching (huffingtonpost.com)
- Get Ready For The Premiere of ‘The Good Wife,’ in September on CBS (dishtvblog.com)
Five Fave Highlights from the Albuquerque Film Festival
Image via Wikipedia
August 18–21, 2011, various venues in Nob Hill and Downtown Albuquerque
I kicked off my Saturday at the 3rd Annual Albuquerque Film Festival at 10:00 AM, when I met my friends at the KiMo Theater to see a couple of local films. I wrapped up around 2:00 a.m. Sunday at the Hyatt Regency, when the smiling waiter cleared our empty drink glasses off our table, hinting that it was time to leave. It was like I was twenty-nine again. Here are some of my highlights from the festival, in chronological order.
1. Not OnBoard. Written and directed by Belle Allen, Mean Mug Films.
“Not to worry. I’ve been trained to handle things like this. Hold, please!” –Wilma, played by Dia Gaitirira.
Watching the big screen and being able to say “I know her!” is pretty freaking cool. Three of my friends had roles in this locally produced ten-minute short about a business man (Allan Gaitirira) who gets lost while driving a rental car and uses the OnBoard assistance program, with hilarious results.
Memorable Moment: Seeing my peeps bring their characters to life. My fellow movie-viewer said to me, “Your friend made a really good hooker.” (Played by Sandi Kay.)
2. This Ain’t No Chick Flick Panel. Sponsored by New Mexico Women in Film.
“A pretty face might get you in the door, but it won’t keep you there.”–Trish Lopez, Director, NM Filmmakers Program, New Mexico Film Office.
A panel of women, ranging from actors, directors, producers, and agents, shared their experiences and answered questions about making it in the film industry. They also discussed the challenges faced by women in the movie business, such as the scarcity of high quality acting parts for women, the importance of a huge Friday night opening, and the persistence of the double standard—the same personality trait will be perceived as leadership in a man, and bitchiness in a woman. It is more important than ever that women support each other, and own their positions.
Memorable Moment: Taking this advice to heart: ignore the naysayers. Persevere. Believe. Do it.
3. Take Me Home. Written, produced, and directed by Sam Jaeger of Parenthood.
“I have no idea how we got here.” “That’s impressive. What with you driving the car and all.”—Claire and Thom, played by Amber and Sam Jaeger.
In this “romantic comedy plus more,” Claire suspects her husband is cheating, learns her father has had a heart attack, hops into a cab, and tells Thom to just drive. Which he does. It’s a cross-country journey with family drama, disasters, lots of laughs, and two lost souls who change each other for the better. Take Me Home is now among my top three Road Trip flicks. I can’t wait for it to come out on DVD.
Memorable Moment: Learning that men love love stories, too. When I told Sam I appreciated how the romance developed over the course of the movie, he replied, “I’m a fan of the slow burn.”
4. Reservoir Dogs. Written and directed by Quentin Tarantino.
“You shoot me in a dream you better wake up and apologize.”—Mr. White, played by Harvey Keitel.
I had put off seeing this movie because everyone talked about the disturbing violence. I finally got that out of the way. I’d really rather remember Michael Madsen as Susan Sarandon’s boyfriend Jimmy in Thelma & Louise. Sure, the acting and storytelling were superb in Reservoir Dogs, but I still complained to my friends about how gruesome it was.
Memorable Moment: Realizing I’ll never to able to listen to “Stuck in the Middle With You” the same way ever, ever again.
5. The After Party. Hosted by AFF at the Hyatt Regency
“Somebody tell me it’s not snowing. Please tell me those aren’t snow flakes on my head right now!”–Belle Allen, writer, director, and producer.
The Not OnBoard gang cracked me up with the-making-of, behind-the-scenes stories: filming during a freak winter storm and sub-zero temperatures, props that didn’t work getting hurled through the air, crew members accidentally walking through the perfect shot, and APD cruisers roaring through the set in pursuit of a suspect.
Memorable Moment: Finding out that success in a creative endeavor is also about pushing through the panic. On filming her debut short, Allen said, “I didn’t eat during [the four-day shoot]. Just chain-smoked. With lots of vomiting.”
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Veronica Mars Movie: 5 Reasons
Dear Warner Bros.:
Here are five reasons to make a Veronica Mars movie.
1. Loveable, flawed heroine
“You don’t want to date me. I’m a train wreck.” VM # 1.19.
Who wouldn’t want to date the cute, smart, funny Veronica Mars? Sure, she’ll break up with a guy and then turn around and ask him for a favor, but only in the interest of seeing justice served. As guy pal Wallace said, underneath the tough exterior, she’s a marshmallow.
2. Audience appeal
“This face. Right here. My over the moon face.” VM # 2.17.
Veronica was sarcastically referring to an upcoming Sadie Hawkins dance that she would be attending solo, but 22,000+ fans are dead serious in their enthusiasm to see a Veronica Mars movie and 168,000+ people listed Veronica Mars as one of their favorite shows on Facebook.
3. Someone to write the script
“Garden State was never a book.”
“It wasn’t? Whoops. So much for that paper.” VM # 3.10.
Veronica Mars creator and writer Rob Thomas said he is ready to write the Veronica Mars movie as soon as Warner Bros. gives the green light.
4. Star power
“Did anyone ever tell you you look like a feisty young Barbara Eden?” VM # 3.17.
Not only is the lead actress Kristen Bell ready and willing to take the part, she has said she would finance the film.
5. Universal themes
Family – “Who’s your daddy?” VM # 1.1 and 1.22.
Friendship – “What did you ever do before you met me?”
“Ever see the first ten minutes of 2001: A Space Odyssey? It was a lot like that.” VM # 1.18.
Justice – “Man had good taste. Let’s honor him by putting his killer behind bars.” VM # 3.13.
Death – “Just thinking if I was going to get drunk and shoot myself, I’d probably drink the good stuff first.” VM # 3.10.
LoVe – “I thought our story was epic, you know? You and me . . . Spanning years and continents. Lives ruined. Bloodshed. Epic.” VM # 2.20.
If this isn’t enough to convince you, release the film rights to creator Rob Thomas and lead actress Kristen Bell so that they can make the movie instead.
“The world is ready for you, Veronica Mars. You are not a yellow cotton dress. You’re red satin. You are strapless red satin.” VM # 1.4.
____________________________________________________________________________________________
VM # 1.19. “Hot Dogs.” Veronica Mars: The Complete First Season. Warner Bros. 2005. DVD.
VM # 2.17. “Plan B.” Veronica Mars: The Complete Second Season. Warner Bros. 2006. DVD.
VM # 3.10. “Show Me the Monkey.” Veronica Mars: The Complete Third Season. Warner Bros. 2007. DVD.
VM # 3.17. “Debasement Tapes.” Veronica Mars: The Complete Third Season. Warner Bros. 2007. DVD.
VM # 1.1. “Pilot.” Veronica Mars: The Complete First Season. Warner Bros. 2004. DVD.
VM # 1.22. “Leave It to Beaver.” Veronica Mars: The Complete First Season. Warner Bros. 2005. DVD.
VM # 1.18. “Weapons of Class Destruction.” Veronica Mars: The Complete First Season. Warner Bros. 2005. DVD.
VM # 3.13. “Postgame Mortem.” Veronica Mars: The Complete Third Season. Warner Bros. 2007. DVD.
VM # 2.20. “Look Who’s Stalking.” Veronica Mars: The Complete Second Season. Warner Bros. 2006. DVD.
VM # 1.4. “The Wrath of Con.” Veronica Mars: The Complete First Season. Warner Bros. 2004. DVD.
Random Tracks from Loisgrl’s Wicked Halloween Playlist
What’s Halloween without a party, and what’s a party without killer music? In compiling my playlist, I realized there is no shortage of songs about darkness, doom, depression, and despair. Imagine that. Fortunately, there is still room for a little magic. Some random tracks from my playlist.
I’m So Afraid – Fleetwood Mac. No spooks or demons needed to get to this condition. All it takes is one’s own loneliness, which is infinite, unchanging, and terrifying.
The Green Manalishi – Judas Priest. The devil is beside you, is at your door, is in your bed. Who else torments and tortures well into adulthood but that one person you thought was your lover? Two pronged crown, indeed.
Still Life – Iron Maiden. Leftover teenage angst is tapped in this creepy suicide pact tale. Or maybe it’s the fluent, haunting opening guitar solo emulating a mysterious pool’s rippling surface that keeps luring me back.
I Put a Spell on You – Nina Simone. Other excellent covers have been made of this song (Creedence Clearwater Revival, Screamin’ Jay Hawkins), but something about Simone’s rendering sinks in and stays with you. When the High Priestess says “you’re mine,” you’d better believe it.
(Don’t Fear) The Reaper – Blue Oyster Cult. Funny title for an ode to everlasting love. Maybe not. Looking for and finding your one and only is an acceptance of need. Anyone you need can leave you, and will one day die. Same goes for you. Fearful stuff. But, God, the alternative: life without love. That’s the real horror.
Witch Doctor – David Seville. What with all the darkness and despair, you gotta throw in some lightness and fun. Besides, behind the squeaky, perky walla-walla is the same story—resorting to a wicked scheme to try to get someone to love you back and end your misery.
Thriller – Michael Jackson. Anything that makes someone with pretty girl issues want to dress up like a tattered, rotting, sunken-eyed zombie, brings a diverse group of people to the park on a weeknight to practice the shuffle-ha-slide during a lightning storm, and gathers an even more diverse of over 200 to perform the dance at Tiguex Park simultaneously with the rest of the globe for Thrill the World, is pure magic.
Summer’s Ending But It’s Not All Bad
Summer has passed so quickly since the early heat wave in June when it was 104 degrees over a weekend and I hadn’t called the guy to set up my swamp cooler yet. Great way to have an existential breakthrough, by the way, getting up at midnight with your blood boiling and sleeping on the camping mattress by the open kitchen window. Now the mornings are cooler and the evenings come dark earlier and the Halloween and Christmas décor is out in full force at Hobby Lobby. Besides brandishing my credit card at the fall shoe preview sales, here are five reasons why I’m coping with summer’s end.
Road Trippin’ to the 80’s
Right before Labor Day I went on a road trip to L.A. with my homegirl who was moving into a studio apartment before starting her final year at USC Annenberg. No better way to celebrate the close of the sunny season than driving through the desert at midnight, scarfing down Peanut Butter Newman-O’s and singing to classic eighties cassettes such as Cyndi Lauper’s “She’s So Unusual,” Janet Jackson’s “Control,” and George Michael’s “Faith.”
When September Ends
. . . I will have finally seen Green Day live in concert. That was the motivation behind the trip to L.A. Last time I had the chance to see them, right here in my hometown, none of my friends at the time liked punk—all R&B and jazz lovers, go figure—and by the time I got the courage to go by myself, the concert had sold out. Totally lame-o. Now, when the autumn leaves start to fall, I’ll remember standing on the lawn at Verizon Amphitheater, arm and arm with my buddy, singing along with Billie Joe to “Good Riddance (Time Of Your Life).”
The Vampire Diaries (TVD) Second Season
Checked out the first season reruns over the summer thanks to Rob Sheffield’s (Rolling Stone) review that lead with the statement, “Every teenage girl should have a vampire boyfriend.” He’s right. No wonder I was so lonely in high school. Too late for that now. Thursday nights with CW’s TVD epic soap of a teenage girl, her vampire boyfriend, and his bad older vampire brother who vies for said girl’s heart, will have to do. And it does very well.
B.B. King and Buddy Guy Live and Together
It seems too good to be true. Two blues greats on the same stage on the same night (September 18th). The last two times I saw Buddy Guy were fiascos: 1) the venue changed at the last minute to this crappy bar with folding chairs where one of the patrons thought it was a jam session and pulled out his harmonica to “play” along with Buddy; and 2) I got stuck at work on a mega proposal and my friend got sick and by the time I found a companion and got out to the venue Buddy was almost done with his set. On the upside, tonight will be my sixth time seeing B.B. King live and, nope, it’s not too many. Presumably, this time I won’t have to snatch a harmonica out of somebody’s hand and beat them to death with it.
Smallville Tenth and Final Season
Clark Kent, Lois Lane, Chloe Sullivan, and Oliver Queen trip through trials and tribulations for one last, and reportedly dark, year. No other show I’ve watched and loved has lasted this long. How fast the time goes. Like summer. Shoot. Now I’m feeling a little sad.
Loisgrl’s Top Ten Songs for the Road
Road trips. Everybody should take one. The motion, the adventure, the escape. Yet, the road goes on forever and the body grows weary. The brain goes numb. The heart gets lonely. You need a little company along the way to keep you going, a sympathetic ear, a pep-talking pal, a kindred spirit.
To shift you into gear, here is Loisgrl’s top ten songs to take with you on the road.
10. Ol’ 55 – The Eagles. Cloaked by the early morning darkness and hush, you back the car out of the garage. This is the time to hit the road, when you don’t have to say goodbye because everyone else is still sleeping. You’ve done something fun and a little bad and you’re getting off scot free. How far can you go before the sun comes up and slices a harsh light on your sins? Let’s find out.
9. One Way Out – The Allman Brothers Band. There’s only one way out of town, with your jeans and T-shirt on, your guitar in the back seat, and the bottle of whiskey in the trunk. The guy or gal who done you wrong is receding into a distant memory, fading away along with the civilization that has been ditched for the long stretch of scrub grass and rock and sky that are along the way to what’s ahead of you. What that is, you don’t know, but there are no cars and no cops out here, so you put your foot to the floor.
8. Fun, Fun, Fun – The Beach Boys. To be young and carefree. All it really takes is for you to release your resistance to pure catchy fun, let your hair down, and roll on out the place, the establishment, the nonsense, bopping in your seat with your inhibition tossed to the wind. Until you arrive at your next destination. Or you could just keep driving.
7. Santa Monica – Everclear. Crank down the window and let the cool, fresh, salty breeze caress your face. The surf slamming into the shore fills your ears and reminds you why it’s great to be alive, even while fleeing the aftershock of a catastrophic breakup. Painful past and foggy future are irrelevant. Right now is the only thing that matters, and right now is pretty damn good.
6. Born to Be Wild – Steppenwolf. Shades on, one hand on the wheel, other elbow out the window, and looking badass. The only reason you know you’re never gonna die is because every end is a beginning. You’re not king of the world, not when the red rock juts majestically against the cloudless blue sky—you’re just in it. Life is grand, and so are you.
5. Highway to Hell – AC/DC. This hasn’t been your most stellar week. You ran that red light, went off on that jackass in the Walmart check-out line, took that phone call from the ex you swore you wouldn’t give the time of day to again, and lied about what you did last night. Time to get out while the getting’s good and turn up the radio as loud as it will go while you’re at it, because you know exactly where you’re going.
4. Sin Wagon – Dixie Chicks. This rollicking, racing whoop of rebellion rousts you out of your stifled, stagnant ways. Daddy might not tell you what to do anymore, but everyone else sure tries to. They’re eating your dust now as you fly down the road to anywhere but here.
3. Crossroads – Cream. You’ve been on the road all day and night has fallen. You feel a little sleepy and you still have a ways to go. You pull over and close your eyes for just a minute . . . your eyes fly open with a start. You hear that dark, urgent, rumbling guitar and bass coming up on you, and you remember that you’re almost there, this is no time to stop. Headlights on, baby. Let’s go for a ride . . .
2. Long Way to Happy – Pink. That one night of what seemed like a good idea at the time has left your with your ego and your emotions stomped and ground into the floor. Will you ever know happiness again? You bet you will. Just peel out onto the highway singing at the top of your lungs. Sure, it’s going to be a long haul, but you’re already on your way.
1. Thunder Road – Bruce Springsteen. That sweet, hopeful song has been calling to you all summer. You’ve been stalling, because what if it’s too good to be true? What if it spirals away into smoke as soon as you reach out to touch it? What if when you get there, it turns out not to be at all what you were expecting, but an empty disappointment instead? What if, what if . . . come on. Get off that porch, jump into the driver’s seat, and go. You know you want to.
Loisgrl’s Top Ten List of Sexy Songs
At a recent networking event, a group of us girls got to talking about music and musicians, and one of the ladies said, “If Maxwell’s “Fortunate” is playing when you” —meaning her husband— “walk through the door, you’re not going to know what hit you.”
I remembered how several months ago Billboard released its list of 50 sexiest songs and left some us confused as to why “Let’s Get Physical” by Olivia Newton-John topped “Let’s Get It On” by Marvin Gaye. (One of my favorite local DJs from the Jeff & Jamie morning show on OMG radio was a little outraged. “A bunch of guys in Spandex is not sexy!”) Billboard’s list was compiled of the 50 most popular songs about sex, based on the song’s performance on the chart. I care more about the performance by a duo in my own personal show, featuring me and him.
To me, a sexy song isn’t just about sex. It’s a song that makes me feel sexy or feel like having sex—preferably both.
Here’s Loisgrl’s list of top ten songs to get naked by.
10. Fire—Bruce Springsteen. The Pointer Sister’s cover of Springsteen’s song is the well-known version, but Bruce’s performance in jeans and a T-shirt, complete with his husky growl and build up, pull back, and climax rhythm is pure sexiness.
9. These Arms of Mine—Otis Redding. It would be hard to resist the call of this would-be seducer’s anguished, impassioned plea. A girl would at the very least get hot and bothered trying.
8. Push It—Salt-N-Pepa. In this female demand for sexual satisfaction, the girl is in control, unabashed, and having fun. When Mama’s having fun . . .
7. If—Janet Jackson. Primal deliverance for anyone who’s ever given in to those futile, frustrating, forbidden fantasies in the heat of the night.
6. In the Closet—Michael Jackson. Before I even saw the video, I knew this was about white desert heat and sweaty bare bodies.
5. Simply Beautiful—Queen Latifah. Sultry smoky guitar strums lead into the sly, “mm-hmmm” purr of the cat that drank the cream. Simply put, the love she’s about to put on him will simply blow his mind.
4. Candy Shop—50 Cent & Olivia. For someone who’s not exactly my type, 50 Cent is inexplicably seductive here with his deep throated and dirty come on over thigh-shaking drums, chest-throbbing bass, and exotic Arabian Nights strings.
3. Let’s Get It On—Marvin Gaye. It’s on everyone’s list, and it’s on mine, too. Because it really is just that good.
2. Breathe On Me—Britney Spears. Simmering with sensuality, this pulsing, breathy, dreamy trip takes you from the dance floor to the bedroom.
1. Love to Love You Baby—Donna Summer. Zero to sixty in twenty seconds or less. The orgasm set to a sweet siren of a chorus—it’s nasty, it’s notorious, and it gets the job done.
Your mood-maker not on this list? Let’s hear it. Send me your personal list of sexy songs and why they work for you. I’ll compile the top ten fever-inducing faves in a future blog post.
